Top Ten Best Tips for Using CSS

Discussion in 'Cascading Style Sheets' started by Dan Allen, Sep 11, 2015.

  1. Dan Allen

    Dan Allen Administrator Founder Not Banned Radio Button Problem - Leader

    CSS drove me crazy for eight years. It follows rules inconsistently. I used to get stressed on CSS.

    Tip 1 - There are two parts to every CSS statement:
    1. The Selector, which tells the computer which parts of a web page you want to follow the style in the 2nd half of the CSS statement.
    2. The Style you what the selected things in step 1 to have.
    Tip 1A - Remember Tip 1. Repeat three times: "There are two parts to every CSS statement: one the selector, and two the style.

    There are two parts to every CSS statement
    1. The selector


    2. The style.
    There are two parts to every CSS statement: one the selector, and two the style.

    Reading it three times doesn't count. SAY it or WRITE it three times. If you are confused about what two things goes into every CSS statement and you have not repeated the statement three times, then you know now what to do. Repeat three times, four is ok, There are two parts to every CSS statement, one the selector and two the style.

    Tip 1C - If someone tells you that the terms you just repeated three times are not the correct terms, tell them to fuck off and refer them to me if you would, please.

    Tip 2 - Of the two parts that go into every CSS statement, the style is the easy part. The selector is the hard part and basically impossible to really understand.

    Tip 2A - If someone says they completely understand selectors, they probably are lying and they definitely are an asshole or faggot, probably both. If you encounter anyone claiming to understand selectors completely, please refer them to me, so I can test their understanding and Asshole/Faggot statuses.

    Tip 3 - Trust CSS
    Trusting CSS is hard, because it is known to produce different results on different browsers. The term for is "it doesn't work right." No one would use CSS if there were an alternative works, So, when something isn't working, unless you already have enough experience with the specific style not working right, it is impossible to know if the problem is in how you wrote the style or in the browser that doesn't do its job correctly. This problem used to be a lot worse, because browsers were extremely fucked up. Now days, CSS is right about all things, except for the Floating Div Scam (see tip 3) and a small number of little things that are so unimportant I never run into them and can style things how ever I want without knowing about the problems, except for the Float Div Scam. So trust CSS, even though the Floating Div Scam is such a big fuckup in CSS, you would have to be an idiot for your trust not to be shaken.

    Tip 4 - THE FLOATING DIV SCAM Give yourself a day with nothing else to do, to wrap your head around the Floating Div Scam. The scam is perpetrated by the retarded people responsible for the CSS specification for the internet. The CSS specification contains an error. Instead of correcting the error, the CSS authorities say it not error. They say floating divs are supposed to work like they do. What if Firestone said your tires are supposed to be flat and they were the only tire maker? The Floating Div Scam is the stupidest thing I ever saw outside the United States Federal Government.

    Tip 4a - After spending a day to understand how floating divs work in accordance with the Floating Div Scam, give yourself a month to try making sense out of it.

    Tip 4b - After you have proven to yourself beyond any doubt whatsoever that the Floating Div Scam is completely retarded and that people who say otherwise are completely full of shit, and you have fully accepted this as a fact of life, starting believing that the rest of CSS actually makes sense and is not like the Floating Div Scam. Moderate alcohol consumption is a reasonable requirement for being able to follow this tip.

    Tip 5 - CSS SELECTORS Get yourself a guide to CSS selectors that makes sense and you can understand enough to remove any reasonable doubt about exactly how CSS selectors work.

    Tip 6: Give up on Tip 5, because it is a hopeless cause. Maybe I will write a guide to CSS selectors someday. It would be the most popular things I ever write.

    Tip 7 - to be determined

    Tip 8 - to be determined

    Tip 9 - to be determined

    Tip 10 - to be determined
    Last edited: Sep 11, 2015
    Kirsten Bolda likes this.

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